Monday, May 22, 2006

A Short Note To Al Gore

Hi Big Al,

Hope all is going well for you. All serial losers need a break from time to time. Sorry I missed the opening of your new flick. I’ve been real busy formulating strategies for my air conditioning clients to take advantage of this coming global warming thing. I’ve been doing a lot of research too. Found a bunch of interesting articles/papers on climate change, like, the cycles of the sun. Did you know it gets noticeably hotter every 50-75 years, then cools down again? (There are slighter variations about every 11-14 years.). Also read up on the orbit of the earth, including; the changing shape of the orbit, the tilt of the axis and wobble around the axis. All of these phenomena occur in cycles of 10, 40, and 100 thousand years and cause all kinds of havoc depending on which fluctuations are coincident. I couldn’t believe it but the moon even has an effect on things like the elevator effect in our oceans! Then I got into the Ice Ages. Studied all of the current research and theories on how they occur and how many we could identify occurring in the last 10 million years, including their severity, size and duration. Wow! Really blows your mind to think that almost the entire North American continent was, and will be again, one big mother of an ice cube!

So I guess your theory and “consensus science” predicts that it’s going to get a lot hotter before we freeze our asses off again. Cool!

The only thing that troubles me is that it’s not happening fast enough. I’m writing this note from a place called New Jersey on May 22, 2006 and the National Weather Service just posted a FROST alert for my county for tonight. This is not good for me, my lawn, my newly planted flowers or my clients. So bring on the heat!

Well Big Al, best wishes that you’ll continue to make a fool out of yourself,


PS; I also found out that methane is a greenhouse gas, so easy on the Tex-Mex food!

PPS; You can find out all this stuff by doing a Google search on “Climate”, Earth Orbit”, “Ice Ages”, “Global Warming” and “Junk Science”.


Blogger Citizen Deux said...

Nicely encapsulated. A lot of discussion on this topic needs to take place. The opening of the Berig Sea to navigation may be an unintended economic boon. But is it manmade, or a recreation of similarities to climate during the middle ages?

3:41 PM  

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